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FEAR OF FAILURE

We become disappointed if we fail in our efforts, which is a natural phenomenon in human life. Though it is said that failure is the first step to success but when it comes to face the failure we often become frustrated. From our earliest days as children we are taught that failure is bad and we quickly learn that it brings shame, pain, humiliation, and embarrassment. The major fear that stands as the greatest obstacle to success is fear of failure. The problem is not actually failure itself , which can make us stronger and more determined, but the fear itself that paralyzes us from action. We attach fear to things we do not need to have any intense feelings about. Fear of failure is what restricts people to their comfort zone. It is what makes them avoid risk and play it safe as the years pass them by. Henry Ford said failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.  Thus, fear of failure must never be the reason not to try something. Abraham Lincolns
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Psychology of Situations

Yesterday I went to my cousin sister’s house, last week she had lost her 35 years old son. When I met her and her daughter-in-law, I was shocked by the way they both stood strong against their loss. In fact, her daughter-in-law even started her job within 8 days of the incident, with full support from the family. In day to day life, we face so many negative, sad and painful situations and these small things or incidences hurt us a lot. In fact, sometimes people even start falling in depression. When we suffer severe sad situations, the moment we accept it, our behavior and thoughts start changing positively. Situation handling in day to day life is an art and if we learn or understand this art, our lives become very happy and peaceful. Acceptance is the first key to situation handling. One of my client’s mother-in-law was creating many issues for her and my client and day-after-day their relation was spoiling. The situation escalated to the point whe
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Counselling – Necessity and Taboo

Yesterday I was sitting with few likeminded people and one of them said people hesitate to change even if they are not happy in the present situation. To prove his statement he narrated an incident. He told us that he happened to meet a group of prostitutes at a rehabilitation centre . These ladies said that they were not leading a normal life and were worried about their old age. The in-charge of the rehabilitation centre asked them to stay at the centre and work for the needy there. He explained that this would enable them to live a more respectable life and they could save for their old age as well. But they were reluctant to leave the place where they were staying and also their profession and come to the mainstream . Now, it’s not that they are enjoying being a prostitute. At some point of time in the initial years, they too might have thought and tried to get out of the situation. But now, they are used to their way of life. They do not want to come out of their comfort zone
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Getting Ready For Marriage

Seema, 27 years, was in love with Shekhar for last 5-6 years. Their family’s financial status, educational qualification, social status, job profiles were all comparable. But still, their parents were against their marriage as they belonged to different communities. Seema and Shekhar were very firm on their decision that if at all they had to marry they would marry each other only otherwise they would not marry at all. After 6 months of discussions between both the families, ultimately their parents agreed for their marriage and they got married. 6 months later Seema came to her parent’s home and said she did not want to go to Shekhar’s house again. What went wrong between them in such a short period? Before marriage, they were sure to lead a very happy married life as they had a lot of things common between them and they had talked about them a number of times. They were confident that they knew each other very well and had a very strong love bond between them. And now Seema was c
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Occupational Stress

It would not be improper if we name today's age as the age of stress and strain. Every individual right from a KG child to his retired grandparents, from a maidservant to the housewife and from an individual standing at the bottom of the hierarchical level to the top boss of the organization-nobody is immune to stress. It may be physiological, sociological, psychological or occupational stress. If we analyse the problems faced by the heterogeneous group of individuals, stress is sure to be found a root cause in the majority of the cases. One is usually unaware that ailments like ulcers, headaches, backache , indigestion, increased blood pressure and fatigue are due to emotional stress. At one time it was thought that such disorders were medical problems physical in origin and that there were little psychologists could do about them. Now, however, these are seen as psychological problems arising from the physical, social and psychological conditions of work. We fre
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Common Errors Of Parenting

Today, it seems very difficult to understand children as a parent. When parents think of talking to their child a lot of questions come to their mind like, would he listen to me? Why is he back answering me? Why doesn’t he like to study? Why my child behaves like this? Why is he emotionally weak? Will he be able to take his own decisions in future? And so on….. When we compare olden days with today's, we find a lot of differences. At times it is also said that in older times we used to have joint families where the head person was the decision maker. No other member was allowed to speak against him, but today’s world is different. Now we have nuclear families and each member of the family has his / her individual views. Today’s children are under strong influence of media, mobile, TV and internet. They do not feel that they are using these in excess. They are in no mood to listen to anything pointed towards their addiction to screen. They often argue that these things belong
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STRESS: Your Inevitable Companion For Life

Your mobile rings late night… OR You hear a door knock late in the night... You receive a notice from the Income Tax dept.. Your Spouse or Children are out and didn't respond to your call… You are in a rush and find your car has a flat tire… You are suddenly asked to make a public presentation (Vote of thanks etc.) You are driving pleasantly and suddenly a rash motorbike rider overtakes with a sharp cut… H ave you ever been gone through these situations..? Now, remember how do you feel at such situations...That exact feeling is a STRESS ... S tress is an integral & inevitable feeling accompanying you through Life. It is our involuntary response to the unfavourable, undesirable circumstances. In fact, it's a kind of a thermometer that indicates the level of your mental disturbances, or your emotional discomforts every now & then. Every situation, every thought, every action creates some amount of stress. And it gets relieved too through your routine a
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